Wednesday, December 31, 2008

We're Back! A Blogosaur Story

What better way to kick off this frosty New Year's Eve than to announce our triumphant return to Blog 'scuse me? A combination of relocating, lack of collaborations between Korn and Lil' Wayne, and getting turned down by Michael Phelps for an intimate interview had forced us into hiding. Now we've returned to delight and terrify and we've brought pictures of cookies from The Lost Cookie Party. We know that you all have been salivating to see the product of our November Cookie Party. Now we're debuting the lost pictures from that magical sugar-dusted night. Our hope is that if and when you encounter us on the street you grab us by the lapels and demand the recipes for the gooey confections below.

Our scrumptious c chip cooks in their doughy infantile stage before they are thrown into a 350F hell box.

Here the chips are at that perfect melty chocotastic phase.

Here we plop some preserves into the squishy adult hamster size balls of dough that will become linzer torte.

The finished product - the inclusion of sea salt made this sort of like a chubby potato chip with blackberry topping. Yummo! (copywrite 2002 Rachel Ray)

Palm Trees fresh from the oven. Apparently, you bake the cooks before you ice them. It only took us our second try to get that right. Lesson learned.

A sparkly sweet treat for Santa's pre-Christmas retreat to Aruba.

A Special Gift for the Holidays
Apparently, Mariah Carey Carey, the science community is not impressed by your glass cracking soprano and quick marriage to Nick Cannon.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Cookie Party Redux!

Our first cookie party was less than successful with no clear winner and decidedly not blog-worthy. It would have helped if we baked something resembling a cookie. However, Tara and I refuse to give up and today (in the spirit of Veganmofo even though it is officially November) we are holding our second ever Cookie Party. Please feel free to join in and email us pictures of your crispy, chewy, fresh from the oven vegan cookie delights. We will post pictures and hold a vote to decide the winner. No prizes, just the simple pleasure of knowing that you won a contest on a blog that gets two visits a day. And isn't that the greatest prize of all?

Our first cookie party attempt:

Chocolate Crinkles - delicious but were more donuty than cookie crisp.

Chocolate-raspberry bark with orange zest. We discovered that accidentally doubling the oil produces cookies similar to charcoal patties.

Email all entries to

You have one week(until November 9, 2008) to grace us with your scrumptious cookie porn before we vote ours the best. We will expose your shots to the public so they can select which cookies look the most suitable for worship.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Moping Over a Hot Stove

This past weekend I broke my commitment to participate in the 2008 ColdNFuzzy Studded Glove Dance-Off. I was well aware that passing up this opportunity was the act of a lunatic, but I had some serious moping to do after the lamest two weeks of my adult life.

And what better way to mope during the Vegan Month of Food than shut myself in my apartment and prepare things to gorge on while watching Rock of Love Charm School?

Saturday's brunch-for-lunch was a tofu scramble with green bell pepper and onion, grape tomatoes with rice vinegar and dried basil, and wheat toast with apricot preserves. I had worked up an intense hunger during the big summer-to-fall wardrobe switch. Sometimes I don't know how I freakin survive these high-velocity weekends.

It's October, and we all know what that means - pumpkincentric everything. I face this yearly pumpkin obsession with zero cynicism. I love pumpkins. I also love cookies, so it made perfect sense for me to grab a can of puree and make these pumpkin clumps. The recipe called for an alarming amount of dry oatmeal, producing a cookie of power bar consistency and slight blandness. Not bad, but next time I'll make sweet rolls.

Monday was less moping, more brown rice. This was a recipe-free attempt at Mexican cuisine - black beans and leftover green pepper and onion were thrown into the rice with some cayenne pepper, cumin, and chili powder. I was impressed, and emailed Chili's this photo with the suggestion that they expand their menu. Chili's was game until they realized the dark things were beans and not chunks of cow heart.

The crowning achievement of the week was tonight's Creamy Pumpkin Soup, which I made with the leftover puree. The original recipe uses chicken broth, evaporated cow's milk, and Parmesan cheese, so I substituted with low-salt vegan broth, reduced some soy milk on the stove, and omitted the cheese garnish. Cumin, chopped jalapeno, black pepper, salt, and a bay leaf wonderfully compliment the mellow flavor of the pumpkin. And how could I resist a dish that calls for sauteed celery??

So thus far, autumn has been alive with oats and gourds - and it's only going to get awesomer. I will now depart to gather more recipes for the mope session I have planned for a random weekend in January 2012. It will most likely feature lattes, butternut squash pancakes, and me entering a depression-induced coma while watching The Fly II.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Girl Drinks and Stray Cats

I'm back from Aruba with some sweet delicious Veganmofo action for everyone who accidentally stumbles onto this blog searching for a Michael Phelps puff piece. That's right! It's the Vegan Month of Food and blog 'scuse me? has plenty of treats planned this month in the way of vegan food and our feverish attempts to destroy pop culture.

My trip started out with a hunt for some soy milk for my morning coffee. I was tempted to use coconut milk, but I found soy milk at a local convenient store. The restaurants in Aruba are generally vegetarian friendly and most places are willing to alter menu items to veganize them. La Trattoria El Faro Blanco and Sawasdee Thai Restaurant both had vegan friendly items on their menus. The Thai place also had an excellent mock duck that you could add to any dish. At Papiamento Restaurant, they had a separate vegetarian specials menu. Texas de Brazil, a churrascaria where guys walk around with huge sword-like skewers of meat, oddly enough had a good vegan selection at their salad bar. The guy that kept the salad bar stocked gladly followed me around telling what was in everything. I had an insanely good tabbouleh here and this superb penne pasta with grilled portobello mushrooms and tomatoes.

I went to this juice bar on the beach where I got a watermelon, mango, and orange juice that was super delicious. Perusing their menu, they also had this drink there called a banana nog with milk, banana, and peanut butter. They unfortunately used cow's milk, but I plan to make my own as soon as I get some ripe bananas.

Curry and Coco - Papiamento Restaurant

This dish was curried vegetables with coconut milk. If you look at the upper right corner of the plate you will see these orange-yellow fruits with tomatillo-like husks. They are my new favorite food and I'm not 100% sure what they are exactly. The waiter at Papiamento told us they were tomatillos. The waiter at Wacky Wahoo's told us they were physalis, which happens to be the same genus of the tomatillo plant. All I know for sure is that it's a delicious fruit they import from Brazil. Wikipedia cleared it up a little. We all know that Wikipedia never lies.

Veggies on the Stone - Papiamento Restaurant

Assorted vegetables served on a sizzling hot stone with an herb-infused olive oil for dipping.

Mixed Vegetables in Peanut Sauce - Sawasdee Thai Restaurant

I also got a vegetarian satay here made with their mock duck. However I scarfed it down before I could take a picture.

Broccoli with Tofu and Cashew Nuts - Sawasdee Thai Restaurant

Seasonal House Salad - Wacky Wahoo's

They made a special pasta with veggies for me here since there was nothing vegan on the menu.

Insalata Ortolana - La Trattoria El Faro Blanco

Linguini Primavera - La Trattoria El Faro Blanco

The pasta was cooked to perfection and had eggplant, zucchini, squash, and red peppers.

Cat watching me eat my pasta - La Trattoria El Faro Blanco

In addition to the adorable cats wondering the outdoor terrace, there was an amazing view of the island from this restaurant.

Random Note: I saw quite a few stray cats and dogs on the island from time to time. I was told they currently have a neuter and spaying program in place for strays. (Information about animal protection in Aruba.)

French Fries - A Taste of Belgium

Not much for vegans on their menu, but they had good fries.

Espresso - A Taste of Belgium

Bruschetta - Salt and Pepper

Mostly tapas here. They had a veggie burger made with eggs and pasta that was also made with eggs.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Are You There, Michael Phelps? It's Me, Done-ness.

I've heard quite a bit regarding your 300-egg-n- cheese-sammich breakfasts. I've heard more than enough about you groping nubile bunnies at the Playboy mansion. So, now that I've paid my dues, can you go away? We all know that Milorad Cavic finished before you and the photo finish was tilted in your favor because you're American (aka a cheese-munching capitalist sofa jockey). We all know that your doofus grin is by no means going to grace the pages of US Magazine two years from now, unless you develop a drug habit or start dating Jessica "Fartin' Under the Sheets" Simpson. Why not throw in the sweaty, chlorine-scented towel while you're on top? Take your chiseled abs and recede into the night, leaving extra space for LoRo and Tiffany Pollard. Also, keep in mind that 140,000,000 calories a day is a touch unwise even for an Olympian.

Jonathan Davis Does Lil Wayne...

...with disturbing results. For reasons that most likely all trail back to the fact that KO(backwards friggin R)N has not released any decent original material since I sat in a classroom watching a filmstrip about lab safety, the man I will from now on refer to as Sweet Johnny D has decided to add Lil Wayne's Got Money to his roster of stolen goods. The song is somewhat delightful, a touch addictive, like heroin that's been left in the sun too long and has a green tinge to it, but come on Sweet Johnny D - the squiggly voice device? Is this your equivalent of a teddy bear t-shirt? Are you shooting for irony, or do you dream of the day when 16-year-old girls who smell of bubble gum and pony stickers call Z100 begging for your dulcet tones?

I know this much is true - if I ever hear SJD singing (Everything I Do) I Do It For You while dressed as a Musketeer and running his voice through Peter Frampton's guitar processor, I will hire Lil Wayne to fracture my sternum with his nosebleed-inducing guitar riffs and a fine, fine set of brass knuckles.

Actually, rumor has it that Bryan Adams has recently recorded a cloying, gently Canadian version of Lollipop. I don't know how you do it, Lil Wayne - enticing the musical masses to mimic you in a way that will never come close to your squeaky-voiced, heavily tattooed, guitar-killing splendor.

Blog-A-Thon Colon Impossible?

What do you get when you mix pad thai, coffee liquor, and tons of lime wedges? A crappy excuse for us to blog while drunk.

We're halfway through a bottle of coffee-infused vodka, and we've polished off about half a pound of the pad thai in all its rice noodley, saucey goodness. Will we make it to the next post? Will our audience be panting at their monitors, practically licking the screen while they await our next pop culture slaughter session? Will we rupture our vocal cords screaming over celebrities without makeup?

Really, this is just an excuse to get drunk, watch The Golden Girls, and take pictures of delicious wittles. I bet you wish you stayed in tonight.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Highlander Was a Documentary, and the Events Real Time.

I was watching the kiddie cartoon Chowder fairly recently and was trying to figure out where I knew the voice of shopkeeper Gazpacho from. I was certain I'd heard it before - neurotic, insistent, a little Nathan Lane-y. After days of remembering nothing (I literally sat in a corner of my living room for three straight days, wracking my brain, while spiders covered me with webs) I checked online (remember when it was 1994 and when you wanted to find something out you had to go to the library or talk to people?)and found out that the guy doing the voice is Dana Snyder, who not only does the voice of Master Shake from Aqua Teen Hunger Force, but has the same first name as Dana Carvey, who probably likes cartoons. See how life comes full circle? I don't either.

Anyway, this pretty much sums up why I love Dana Snyder.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Myspace & Facebook Go the Way of Friendster

The internet has a new social networking darling: Hoffspace. Have you ever been on Myspace and just couldn't click with your random fake friends on something that really matters, like an American pop star famous in Germany who enjoys lying on hotel room floors at 4am devouring cheeseburgers after 15 shots of Jim Beam, and habitually talks to his Pontiac Trans Am who sounds like Mr. Feeney from Boy Meets World?

We're talking about the man who was there right after the Berlin Wall collapsed to help unite East Germany and West Germany... and now, he wants to help unite the world. Over 14 thousand devoted followers so far have become hooked on David Hasselhoff's feeling. We estimate that it will take 3 to 4 days for that number to quintuple. The format is strikingly similar to Myspace, only good. Even better, there is no fear of logging onto your page one day and finding a douche with a shit-eating grin gazing over his shoulder at you. So join us on this Hoff-tacular journey before you're the only loser not on Hoffspace.

Below you will find links to our respective Hoffspace pages. Join, befriend us, appreciate this barrel chested, permed god as he unites the world in the fight against inspirational headlines and sparkly pink backgrounds.

Tara's Hoffspace page

Monica's Hoffspace page

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Fun with Lasers

Nowadays, lasers are for more than just pointing at things and reading bar codes. The new Radiohead video for the song "House of Cards" was shot without a single camera. Instead, they used 64 rotating lasers and a scanning system to render the three dimensional floating head of Thom Yorke. Genius. Watch the video. Watch the making of video. If you have time, you can play with the technology by moving Thom Yorke's disembodied head around your screen. I must warn you after a while it becomes a little creepy.

Random Laser News:
For all you ravers/laser fanatics, at a recent festival in Kirzhach a laser light show turned into the second worst thing that could happen to you at a rave when a few days later attendees started complaining of vision problems. At least 61 confirmed cases of laser blindness. You can read more here.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

The words "burrito," "botox," "Tom Cruise," and "hangover" are words...

Anyone who reads the newspapers is aware that tonight is Lachapalooza 2008. What does that mean for Blog 'scuse me?? It means bastardizing popular libations and baking up some amazing vegan treats for the meat-scented masses. Breaking News!!! Malibu Bay Breeze snow cones shall grace this event for the first time in Lachapalooza history. Will this year mark the return of the beer pong table? Only time will tell. Will the members of ERINLACH be making an appearance? Is it possible that they will play Man Thighs Are Yucky this year, compelling the police to visit for its sheer magnum force? Will there be an unfortunate mishap involving a bottle of Jameson, a Slip N Slide, and a frantic 911 call? Will Allie take a swan dive into the keg again? Will Erin's hallway once again flood with beer and hamburger vomit? Will there be sequined flip flops?

One question we know the answer to is whether we will be subscribing to Cosmopolitan Magazine aka National Dairy Council approved Prada wearing Sausage Pounders. Why, do you ask, would we be so bitter? Could it be that a recent issue advises readers not to invite vegans to barbecues? Do they fear losing their precious Got Milk ads if a single subscriber invites a vegan into their household? Do they imagine vegan guests replacing kegs of beer with barrels of nutritional yeast? Are they worried that blocks of tofu will make their readers turn against men no longer needing the nauseatingly prevalent sex tips and how I finally tamed him testimonials? Are they upset that we bring scrumptious baked goods and force people to drink inventive cocktails (that might just be us)? Do they have nightmares of a storm cloud forming over the backyard and unleashing a downpour of fluffy puppies and hemp products? Which has happened a couple times but trust me everyone had fun once the shock wore off and we laid out some newspapers for the puppies.

Blog 'scuse me? will promptly give you the lowdown on all the charcoal stained debauchery that will surely take place tonight. Unless of course we are in jail or watching after the puppies.

Here's a snippet of the treats we will be bringing to this year's Lachapalooza. So when you are thinking about inviting a vegan to your barbecue heed Cosmo's warning. God knows people hate chocolate chip cookies and booze.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Greatest Actor of the Past Nine Generations Showcase

Oh, Crispin Glover. Anyone who can join forces with Corey Feldman to inject some dignity and grace into Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter is deserving of worship. This was further proven in the 1986 exercise in fabulosity, River's Edge, which stars not only the disturbingly talented and sexily coiffed Glover, but effing Dennis Hopper as a gun-toting, sex-doll-loving pot fiend.

Only the beautiful Crisp could elevate pill-popping and desperately attempting to conceal a brutal murder committed by an acquaintance to an art form. The skull cap and black outfit don't hurt, either. Keep up that 80s intensity, and while you're at it, dump Courtney Peldon.

Brad Pitt Finds His Calling

Dubai is one of the seven emirates that make up the United Arab Emirates and home to a new five-star hotel complex. Each of the 800 rooms in this luxurious hotel will play nothing but the movie Cool World. Who is responsible for this desert oasis? Who is the man brazen enough to order around licensed architects like they're production assistants on the set of Seven Years in Tibet? Is it possible that Floyd from True Romance's true calling was architecture? I know what you're all thinking: "Why is Brad Pitt still making movies when his passion is architecture?"

Gold Nanoparticles Fight HIV

That's the headline of an recent article, which leads me to the most logical conclusion: South Park was right! Is it possible that the cure for AIDS is a large dose of concentrated cash (approximately $180,000)? Only time will tell...

Tara is In Your Extended Network

As an avid Myspace stalker, I've come across several things on America's most colorful douchenozzer networking site that piss me off. Let's address these point by point, shall we?

Number One: The I Am Gorgeous, You Are Garbage Showcase

Okay, so you wear cleavage-bearing tank tops from H&M. You have hair that never falls out of place and lip gloss that never smudges. You've nailed three or four sexy poses, and most likely have a signature pose that appears in 18 or 19 shots in your photo albums. Must you further hammer the wooden stake into my chest with the endless redundant captions? "Me and my girls, looking hot as usual!" "You know you want this..." "Don't you wish your gf was a freak like me?" If you want to make homely girls jealous, why don't you get off the computer, meet them at the bar, and make out with the cute guy they hoped would approach them? Afterward, you can point at them with your finely manicured nail and giggle while they cry in a fetal position at the subway station.

Number Two: The Couples' Shrine (sometimes with babies)

Animal shrines are perfectly acceptable, don't get me wrong. I could stare for six straight hours at a photo of a large-eyed cocker spaniel wearing a neckerchief. But when you dedicate your profile to an overwhelmingly clingy relationship you've been in for three months, I get stomach cramps. To add insult to injury, couples' shrine profiles are often punctuated by endless back-and-forth comments between the guy's and girl's separate pages:

"Had so much fun last nite baby! You're my ittle wittle schnookum cakes and I will ALWAYS love you no matter what the haters may try to tell us!"

"Me too loveymuffpuffdoodle! Today I saw a commercial for Zales and totally dreamed of buying you that princess cut diamond you want! Just a few more years babe! Then it's you and me and our future children - Deke, Dakota, and Skylar!"

Number Three: The Superdouche Deep Intellectual Page

I like books. I like to think sometimes, and wear the occasional ironic t shirt after dark. Why do these qualities separate you from the rest of society? If your General Interests section reads like a Dennis Miller diatribe, I am not jazzed. Your love of obscure British television (i.e. The Office) and rage over the tumult in Darfur doth not make you special. We all know that at the end of the day, you peel off your Teddy Ruxpin zip-up, turn on Spike TV, and gorge yourself on Jack Links.

Robert Kelly Finally Aquitted!!!

After six years of emotional torment, America's R&B hero has finally been found not guilty on all 14 counts of child pornography-type graphic sex thingies. After approximately 568,998,703 witnesses were called in an attempt to discover the identity of the preschooler that the quote-unquote man in the video peed on, the jury deliberated and finally concluded that R. Kelly is as pure of mind and spirit as a newborn baby fawn traipsing through a dandelion field.

Thank you Jesus!

Blog-a-thon 2008

Welcome to Blog-a-thon 2008, where the fun doesn't stop until we pass out. We'll start posting as soon as we are done with our morning cocktails and fresh from the oven bagels. Prepare yourselves for a barrage of random complaints, pop culture meltdowns, and razor edge tutorials.

As we blog we will be fueled by the following:

Dark and Stormy (special thanks to Melanie), Brotherly Love (special thanks to Three Olives Root Beer Flavored Vodka aka our new water substitute), Tangerini-Tinis (special thanks to Scrubs) and Cosmopolitans because you can't have a girl drinks night without it.

Maybe later we can slip into half comas, do our nails, and watch Sex and The City.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

SUMMER: It's not just a neo-hippie girl's name anymore

The scent of
Victoria's Secret body splash is in the air and you know what that means... Summer has arrived and in about a week it will be official. Here at Blog 'scuse me? we are amping up our content to keep you informed on all the pop culture treats you are missing out on while you're panhandling on the boardwalk.

First, this Saturday will be our first ANNUAL BLOG-A-THON. That's right kids. We will be blogging nonstop all day long.

In addition to that, we are planning a Vegan Walking Tour based on the one published in Issue 14 of
Herbivore Magazine. More information about that once we decide on a date and put a map together.

National Pigeon Day is this Friday! There will be festivities in Central Park from 4-8pm. Or you can celebrate by reading this article about pigeon obesity that somehow turns into an article about chewing gum.

Other things to look forward to this summer:

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

The Campaign Has Begun... get John Henson off the TV Guide Network.

The man who once owned Talk Soup has now been reduced to discussing cable listings with Nikki Taylor. Unacceptable. That delightful George deserves better too. Any golden retriever who quotes Yeats and debates the validity of Elvis' career is in dire need of his own sitcom/educational program/variety show.

The John we have:

The John we want:

If all goes according to plan, John will be off the step-and-a-half-above-public-access set in fewer than three months and go on to host his own Comedy Central show, busying himself with the dissection and desecration of pop culture. Sir Thomas of McNamara, Perrin Sprecace, and Alan Wu are required to participate. Let's not let any more funny people go to waste while crappy humor flourishes. Do you know who has his own sitcom these days? Bill Engvall.

Bill Engvall.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

The Winds of Shit in a Low Pressure Shit System

...or was it a shit storm? I don't remember our exact team name at New York Magazine's Indie Rock Trivia Night last week but you get the gist. Somehow we did not win for most creative team and ended up losing to the Dead Ted Kennedys. First off, I demand a recount. Not even Zach Galifianakis, the host of the event, agreed with this decision, probably because he saw our Round 4 card where we drew hearts around his picture with an arrow to it saying "That's So Raven". Secondly, it's called "most creative" not "most topical and offensive".

I believe that's enough ranting. Now I'll just try not to turn this into a love letter to Zach Galifianakis.

The night started out with some classic Zach. He even did the "LOOK here come the Choo-Choo" joke that makes me laugh hysterically every time it pops into my head while I'm waiting for a train. There were four rounds of trivia. I didn't realize they had categories until the second round which was 90's Trivia followed by 70's & 80's Trivia. The fourth round they changed things up with Kanye or Nay which took me back to a game my family used to play on long road trip called Goulet or Nay. They basically have same rules. In our game, someone would say a line or so of lyrics to a song and you would shout out Goulet, if it was a song Robert Goulet did, or Nay, if not. Kanye or Nay worked the same way except you wrote the answers down on the card. It's a little less fun that way. In between trivia rounds they showed this interview with my other crush, Michael Showalter.

After the intense trivia session, Les Savy Fav took the stage and put on an incredible show. Tim Harrington had enough costume changes to make Vanna White jealous. Zach even joined them on stage during one of their songs which was the highlight of the night for me.

Tim & Zach

Of the 75 or so pictures I took that night, about 70 of them are just of Zach. I couldn't help myself.

I believe the winners of the Indie Rock Trivia are behind Zach in this one.

Check out Stereogum if you'd like to read a review with less ranting and better pictures. Plus, you can see all the Les Savy Fav costume changes.

Here's a crappy video I took of some hipsters dancing.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Open Letter To David Cross

David Cross
Dear Mr. Cross,

When we heard your velvety voice demanding pills from Meatwad, we knew that you were a supreme being placed on earth to make us all feel like doucheschnozzers. If only we could titter wickedly with you while sipping coffee and wearing cutoff jeans. Imagine the three of us skipping down the street arms linked singing "chicken pot chicken pot chicken pot pie", that is a dream that we've shared since swooning over slow Donny in the late 90's. Even roles that you may have regretted in hindsight, like that smarmy chipmunk abusing manager in a movie that will remain nameless, we worship your skill and your hot glasses. Only you could make wheelchair break dancing look effortless with that certain I don't know what that steals the scene.

We hope that the purpose of this letter is clear. Blog 'scuse me? would like to go on a date with you. Time, date and place are totally up to you. We're not picky when it comes to basking in the glow of your presence. And just as an aside, we taught Amber Tamblyn how to make out. Contact us at We'll be checking our email every 5 seconds while listening to Creed and crying gently.

Hugs n kisses,
Tara and Monica

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Snippets of Hell: Old-School PSAs

I'm sure I'm not the only person who finds this bit from the mid-80s creepy and unecessary. Yes, Pee Wee Herman has always been an idol of mine, but so has Steve Urkel, and I would back away slowly if he was gravely advising me not to hit the pipe.

When not one-upping Daffy Duck, Bugs Bunny enjoyed pointing out to children that the appliances in their kitchens would murder them if they only got close enough.

Finally, the worst one of all - a 90s spot that gave me a grammar-school nervous breakdown that was never topped, not even by the Muppets. Note that when I first saw this I was alone in a dark basement.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Boston and Awesome Rhyme, Sort Of

So last weekend's trip to Boston was pretty sweet, schizophrenic weather aside. Monica booked us a room at the Newbury Guest House, where we drank sake and watched Spongebob Squarepants.

Gotta love that "lived-in" look.
The window wouldn't open, which worked to our advantage because I get Supergirl Syndrome after five Bloody Marys and three-quarters of a bag of Lay's.

Saturday morning was brunchtime at the OtherSide Cafe - nibbles included toast, scrambled tofu, vegan sausage, and hash browns. Why didn't they put ketchup on our table?
After brunch we ambled to the park for some swan stalking. This shot took patience because the guy just wouldn't stop hiding his face. How dare you groom while I'm trying to create apartment decor!

Sadly, the tables were turned when we were hunted by two highly sassy squirrels. This sassiness probably has something to do with the fact that people don't know how to behave responsibly around animals.
Caught in a swan frenzy, we crossed the footbridge to the swan boats and took a ride across the lake for some long-distance scenery worship. We had the pleasure of sharing the boat with a group of high schoolers who were more interested in the duck crapping next to us than the landscape.
Remember the sake I mentioned earlier? Uh oh! Did someone say extra-dry??

After the sake and cartoons, we headed to Betty's Wok and Noodle Diner for noodly-veggie-saucey-type meals. Seated two tables away was an irate customer who ordered the Va-Va-Vegan and was served something that included chicken.